Tuesday, August 19, 2008

baby blood found in freezer! will you PAY to keep it there?

O My God.

so I was just browsing the internet, leaning about cascading style sheets and the like, when i notice on one of the pages i'm browsing, THIS banner ad...

ok really... now I've got to know what this is all about.

upon clicking the link I'm taken to a website that informs me that I can, for an additional $2,500.00, store my baby's umbilical cord blood in an "ice bank" for as long as ONE YEAR... one year! really, that's the cost of keeping Pluto's 'bilical-blood' frozen for 365 days. [my first will be named Pluto regardless of sex].

now what I'm thinking at this point is: why would I EVER want to freeze my kidd-o's umbilical-blood? any takers?... anybody have any idea why I might pay such an astronomical price to lock up kiddie RNA in the chill chest?

so he wont get sick.

at least thats what the folks at Cryo Cell wants me to think. apparently, there's going to be some catastrophic disease that will befall my child in the next year that will require frozen umbilical blood to escape, and for the menial cost of $2,500.00 a year I can apparently cross him/her/it off the infected list. It seems to me that what's really going on here is some schmuck [maybe Cheney maybe not] is financing scientists to offer vulnerable mothers an alternative to a disease-ridden first year of childrearing [which ALWAYS happens], for the exchange of their own newborn's DNA fingerprint. with which he can breed his own clan of super-voters who will be genetically programmed to vote for Judd Bush[Dubya's great nephew] and/or shoot people in the face.

best part is, if I can just convince you to relinquish the soul of your next-born I'm entitled to a 5% discount on my policy! sign up now!

[all images taken directly form site. cant make this stuff up]

stay up,


1 comment:

Rin said...

aaahahaha. sign me up.